Debbie's fantastic chickpea curry

I have this friend called Debbie.

You know how you have some friends who, if you weren't friends with them, you would totally worship from afar, secretly longing to be friends with them because they are so awesome? My friend Debbie is one of those. 

She's one of the greatest moms I know (I copy her tricks all the time), she is a great cook, gardener, she's clever and resourceful, I've never seen her in a bad mood, and...

Well.  This could be a worshiping post but it's not.  This is really about her awesome chickpea curry.  We made this curry for the first time together in her kitchen in Floreasca in Bucharest.  We had two kids each at that point, and our husbands were buddies.  She made it for me as a pick-me-up food after Jacob's birth, too.  Oh, good times, good times. 

Anyway.  This is, as curries often are, a total non-brainer.  You can alter, add, and expand this recipe however you like.  My kids won't touch it which is why I make it a bit spicier and also add ginger.  One day, they will discover the wrongness of their ways...

Debbie's fantastic chickpea curry

2-4 onions (I like more of them)
2 cans of chickpeas (or if you have dried chickpeas, pre-soak them overnight)
1 large can of peeled tomatoes (or fresh ones! even better!)
Some vegetable or chicken stock
Spices to taste: Curry powder, coriander powder, cumin powder, salt, pepper, ginger...
A few handfuls of spinach

That's it!  Chop the onions and saute in olive oil on medium to low heat until softened.  Add spices to taste (I used Jaipur curry powder today which is a bit sweeter), and let them roast for a minute or two.  Add drained chickpeas and stir.  Saute for another few minutes, then add the whole can of tomatoes, crushing the tomatoes with your fingers as you put them in.   Add the stock, turn up the heat and let the whole thing bubble gently.  Add spinach towards the end.  Serve with rice (which Debbie makes with coriander seeds and a stick of two of cinnamon and you should totally also do that). 

I tinker endlessly with this recipe.  I add hot pepper flakes or not.  If I don't have spinach, I add peas or green beans or broccoli.  Or kale!  Or Swiss chard! Or you know what's really good?  Arugula.  Weird but true.  You can leave the ginger out if you are like my other awesome friend who doesn't like ginger.  If you are totally weird, you can add some garlic, too.

Easy, right?  And yet... so, so good.  Maybe even better the next day.  It's exactly the right thing to eat on a cold rainy day in November.  Or on a glorious sunshiny fall day in September.  Really, eat it any time.  Enjoy!

Curry.jpg

Pristina

So we have arrived.  

It's not a big secret that I didn't really want to be here.  I was prepared for Skopje, Macedonia and had my heart set on it, even though I'm somewhat (okay, a lot) tired of the Balkans.  But, beggars can't be choosers, so I was willing to see the best in Macedonia (beautiful country, awesome school, close to the beach) when Doug's company told us that we couldn't live in Skopje, we had to live in Pristina.

[They put the blame on USAID but I think they just didn't want to deal with the paperwork.  The local middle/high schools aren't listed on the State Dept/USAID list of accepted schools for their own people, so we have a right to be stationed in a nearby place with an accepted school.  The company seems to do this a lot, not giving us what we're entitled to.  This is putting a major damper on pretty much everything, if you have to claw and fight for every little thing.]

At that point, only a few weeks out, I just couldn't wrap my head around this.  There was too much to do and arrange, there was the agonizing choice between two mediocre schools for Alan, there was the scramble for a dyslexic program at home (in Skopje, they have a special ed program), the move to arrange with four bored kids at home on summer break.  I only started reading up on Kosovo the night before we left Germany. I didn't even know the most basic of Albanian words which is totally not how I usually do this.  I couldn't get excited about Kosovo because, let's be honest, Kosovo is simply unexciting. I have friends who recently moved to Nepal (which has been my dream destination since I can remember), to Kampala/Uganda, who live in Bermuda and South Africa, in Dubai and Rome.  You know, cool places. Kosovo is definitely not cool. 

So, it's not cool.  But sadly, it's also not charming. Pristina itself is quite unattractive.  Its suburbs endlessly stretch out along the 30 or so kilometers to the border, so all you see upon approach is bad traffic and bad roads. Oh, and the odd mosque, which is a little bit exciting. I do like mosques, and I like the call of the muezzin.

Pristina is dirty.  Now, Ubud is dirty, too, and Istanbul, and, oh dear, Ramallah.  But how weird is it that a city can be dirty in a charming way?  Do you know what I mean?  Pristina does not do dirty the charming way.  If anything, it looks tired. The surrounding vegetation is yellow and dry and done for the year.  It reminds me a bit of Yerevan which is also not a beautiful city - however, you don't notice it because you keep staring at beautiful Ararat towering over the city.  There is no Ararat here.

The new buildings in the city (and there are a lot of new buildings) are a mixture of bewildering and plain WTF? *What* were you thinking? Is this really supposed to be, you know, used by humans?  And everything, even new construction, seems in disrepair.  The big Germia pool right next to our house has large patches of the concrete surrounding missing, revealing the criss-crossing rebars underneath.  The supermarket has potholes on the floor. Our house is newly built and has only been lived in for a few months.  There are holes in the walls and odd openings, and cables, and things break down all the time.

But here's something that is utterly charming about Pristina:  The people.

I have never ever met a friendlier people. People who forgive you and wave at you when you're driving the one-way street in the wrong direction the moment they identify you as a stranger. Who help you, who speak English or German in abundance, who smile at you - and I mean everybody, from the youngest to the oldest, from teenagers ("Can you tell me how to get to Matiqan?" -- "Dude, you really got messed up here, let me see, you need to go back...") to policemen. It seems everybody is genuinely happy to see you.  It started with the immigration officer at the (non)border to Serbia, and hasn't stopped yet.  Yesterday was trash day and I didn't know.  I heard the garbage truck and ran downstairs, out into the yard to drag the trash bin out - and caught the garbage men as they returned the bin back into our front yard.  They had opened the gates, dragged the bin out, emptied it... and then they smiled at me and said, "Mërkurë, po? Mërkurë!" Right, lady? Next week you don't forget to put the bin out? I don't know a country where that would happen.

We also seem to have lucked out with Alan's school.  Everybody is charmingly friendly and welcoming.  There are a lot of new teachers who are very motivated, and there is a very dedicated new principal.  I had a long-ish talk with the principal about the dyslexia and the ADHD and he told me that he and his wife (who is Alan's teacher) have an extensive background in special ed.  They asked me not to put Alan on Ritalin for the first few weeks, to see how he is doing, and reevaluate sometime in September.  "We can always go on medication if the class interaction makes him bounce off the walls.  But who knows? He may not need it at all!"  This is truly the first time a teacher has told me that.  Hard not to love that, eh?  After Alan wrote his placement test, his teacher told me he did fantastic and she's looking forward to having him in her class.  What a difference to the German school system!

Alan has his first day today - a field trip to a local pool.   When I dropped him off at the school, we ran into two other American kids.  The boy seemed 16 or 17, and his sister maybe a year younger. The principal said to them, "This is a new kid...", and the boy replied, "Don't worry, we'll take care of him."  What's not to like?

So.  Rocky start.  The house has lots of problems but it's also roomy and we can work with it.  The move hasn't arrived yet.  Doug's company is underwhelming.  But the people have already won me over.  It only took them a few days.

Well played, Kosovars. 

 

Why that move was so stressful

Yesterday was the most stressful moving day I've ever had. 

Doug's US-based company who is contracting to USAID started it by hiring a US relocation company to organize our entirely European-based move.

The relocation company, in turn, contacted an international moving company with an office in Skopje (because, apparently, they don't work with any of the other international moving companies that have an office in Pristina -- yes, they exist) to arrange for our move.

That moving company asked a German company to pack up our house and deliver the boxes to that company's storage facility where the Macedonians can pick it all up. 

Doug's company gave us 5,000lbs (net!) weight of moving allowance.   

Nobody outside the US uses weight in moving (unless in air freight but this wasn't air freight).  Everybody else uses volume.  The Macedonians use a rough formula that has all sorts of considerations about density and averages and whatnot worked into it which roughly equates to 90kg per cubic meter.   Oh, can you see the problem here?  METRIC SYSTEM, for the win!  But nobody outside of the rest of the world uses the metric system, so we have a communication problem with the relocation company.  Also, you may have noticed that our weight allowance is NET weight, whereas in the rest of world, those cubic meters include packaging materials.

Are you still with me? 

The US relocation company fears and loathes the rest of the world system, so they insist on their 5,000lbs net weight, even when the Macedonians and the Germans suggest to use 24.5 cbm instead.   They insist on a weight ticket of the truck including the packaging materials.  The truck arrives, I ask whether they have the weight ticket, the packers are Russian and Polish and German and they nodd.  They survey my stuff and hem and haw. "We can't fit that into the truck.  That truck is too little."

You know what?  I had noticed that.  The truck was a 3t truck which, in German, is not even a regular truck but a Kleinlaster, a "small truck".  I had expected a 7.5t truck which is laid out to carry weights of 2,268kg (ah! metric system! that's your 5,000lbs for you).  

They start packing, and decide their best way of attack is to stuff all containers full of things, thus exceeding the recommended 80kg/cbm (not 90!) to about 100kg/cbm. They made sure I was aware of their dedication and ingenuity by grunting a lot when they carried the boxes outside. 

Now, remember they said they had weighed the truck? 

It turned out they had no idea what I was talking about.  I called the moving company, "Why was the truck not weighed?"
"We will weigh it tonight." 
"But my 5,000lbs are net weight and if you weigh it tonight, that'll be a gross weight."
"Well, we didn't get around to weighing the truck this morning, so we are going to weigh it tonight.  Since the guys know how much material they used to pack your belongings, we will unpack the truck [into storage] and then weigh it again with the corresponding amount of packaging."
"Hm."  Not complicated at all.  Especially since we have an official weighing station just 10 minutes from our house.

The problem I have with the weight allowance is that there is no way to know how much you can actually pack.  Sure, books are heavy, so you'd rather pack paperbacks than hardcovers. But is your table heavy or not? If you use plyboard you'll be better off than with a solid wood table. That's all sensible and easy to understand but look at your living room and give me a quick estimate of the weight of your belongings. Hm?  And now give me a quick estimate of the volume.  I can tell you that the latter is much easier than the former. 

We squeezed. We pushed. The truck was packed under the roof.  My spanky new iMac was loosely put on top of other boxes, only in its native box, no additional boxing or packaging.   I confess to being rather worried about its fate. Anxious. Really really not sleeping well.  In any case, there were quite a few things we needed to leave behind. Shelving, chairs, toy chests, lots of books. 5,000lbs is a measly moving allowance, especially for a family of six. 

We ended up 300kgs over our allowance, gross. I cannot tell you how much packaging was used. 100kg? Maybe? So, 200kg over. I will tell you for nothing that if this costs more than a few hundred Euros, I'm going to blow an artery.  Because left to my own devices, I'd have hired a local moving company with a 20 foot truck, had the local packers stuff it full, had the customs officer seal it in my front yard, sent it off to Pristina, and not only would have managed to move all of what I wanted to take but kept under whatever Doug's company is now spending, had had much less stress and hassle, and would have been faster, too.

But nobody asks me. 

 

 

Legoland

We took the kids to Legoland yesterday. 

When I say "we" and "the kids", I mean my brother, his wife and I took all of our kids (except the littlest one) to Legoland.  On a hot, hot day, right smack at the beginning of the summer break in Bavaria and Baden-Württemberg. 

So it was hot and crowded.  Long lines at all the best rides, of course.  Really, I loved the Jungle Tour but standing in line for 45 minutes for a 4 minute ride is kind of lame.  But the kids absolutely loved, loved, loved it and proclaimed me the best mom in the universe, so I declare it a complete success. 

Highlights:

  • Leah rocked the race car building competition.  Her little car did really well and beat most of the other much more complicated contraptions. 
  • Pyramids are most stable in an earthquake. 
  • Gold washing - Alan found a pyrite, and David and Jacob got a "golden" medal. They loved it so much. 
  • Jungle Ride - splash!  Leah was absolutely terrified and clung to me but afterwards, she giggled and laughed and wanted to go back right away. 
  • Every child now owns a brand new Lego T-shirt.  Because that is important. 
  • All the kids are just now sitting at the breakfast table building their little sets they got at the end of the day for exemplary behavior. 
  • The boys passed their "driver's test" and are now in possession of a real Lego driver's license.   

Because it was so hot, I was burdened down with water bottles and left my big camera behind.  But I used my iPhone to make a few shots, so here you go: 
(It's a gallery, click on the arrows to view the next image!)

We left around 6:30 pm or so and stopped at the next Autobahn oasis for an evening meal. Food is very expensive at Legoland and also with the heat, ice cream and mini carrots were the only things the kids were willing to eat.  They were ravenous at the oasis, and a bit tired and wired.  I promptly managed to lose my youngest child - bad memories of losing Alan at an oasis 10 years ago came back to me.  I didn't panic but I had this little mantra playing in my head, "If I don't find her in two minutes, I'm calling the police.  If I don't find her in 90 seconds, I'm calling the police..."  I found her.  But I had to lean into her that walking off by herself to go *outside* to play on the playground right next to the truck area is NOT a good idea. 

We came home at 10:30, exhausted but happy.  We'll do it again, but with Daddy next time, who manages to drag the kids on rides which they refused this time.  I am sure they would have loved the Ninjago Dragon Rider -- my brother and nephew really enjoyed it.  Next time - it's always good to have a reason to come back.

How to teach your kids about money

I guess you could just be lucky and have frugal kids who know all about how to handle money and budget their allowances from the day they were born.  If so, congratulations, you have totally lucked out.  In fact, I have one of those.  He reminds me of my brother who is the same way.  My brother also always had money. The three others, though...  they are more like I was when I was a kid.  I had to learn budgeting the hard way when I went away to college.  I'd like my kids to be able to do this before they leave home one day.

We set up allowances a while back.  It wasn't much, only a Euro or so per week.  However, Doug never paid out their money for fear they'd just spend it on candy. (Which is true for, well, at least two of them.)  That's not quite the way to go, I objected.  That's not how they learn to handle their own money, that's how they learn to be mad at Daddy.  If you are a natural spender, you have to hit rock bottom at least once to see how spending all your money will get you in trouble.

Back when we homeschooled, I thought it was a good idea to incorporate that into the curriculum.  I bought a book or two but nothing much ever came of it.  Partly that was because we stopped homeschooling shortly after, and partly because we didn't have a good system in place for their allowances and spending (see above).

Then, a few weeks ago, I read about FamZoo somewhere on the Internet.  It sounded interesting enough to check it out.  What is it, you ask?

FamZoo is a family friendly web site that helps parents teach children the practical skills they’ll need to thrive in the real world. Our learn-by-doing online tools include:
  • A virtual family bank for teaching money basics, managing allowances & chores, setting budgets, tracking savings goals, encouraging charitable giving, and much more.
  • Family checklists for making and sharing lists of all kinds: weekly chores, ToDos, homework assignments, groceries ... you name it!
Using FamZoo together, families build strong financial, social, and organizational habits in a safe, friendly environment.

Basically, what it does is it tracks all the allowances virtually and you as the parent hold the actual money.  You dole it out, you control it. 

The strength of the program is its flexibility.  You can choose three basic types of accounts for your child.  There is a simple one for very young children where you just pay money in on behalf of the child.  This can be used to keep track of money gifts, like baptism gifts, or birthday gift cards.  The next stage is for school-age children and is divided into Spending and Saving, and the stage after that is Spending/Saving/Charitable Giving.  Another nice feature is that you can set up what is called Saving Goals.  Alan is saving money for a Nintendo 3DS - so half of his weekly allowance is going into his savings account - the program will tell you how long it will take for him to reach this goal (in November) which is a great visual help. 

In the meantime, we keep track of all the money he is spending by writing it all down.  If he needs some money, he comes to me and asks for it.  I give him the actual physical money and he tells me what he plans to spend it on.  This way, he can keep track of his spending.  The kids can also sign into their accounts (and only their accounts) to check balances.  Only the parents can view all accounts.

One can set up payable chores (I'm firmly in the "we are family and we all contribute" camp and refuse to pay for things like making the bed or setting the table), or debits for misbehavior like fibbing or not doing homework.  If they lose 10 cents each day for not making their beds, those beds are soon as tidy as you could wish for!

I love how the program makes their in- and outgoing money streams visible for them. We have a rule that you own any money you find on the floor, so every day I have a child coming to me giving me a cent or two to add to their accounts.  It adds up quickly and shows them that every penny counts.  (I'm still waiting for the day when there are no more coins on the floor - where do they come from?) 

FamZoo also has a (very basic) phone app which is very practical when you are on the go and the kids want to purchase a souvenir in Paris, or buy cotton candy at the fair.   

The result of all this is that David has been able to buy a much coveted Nintendo 3DS after his birthday instead of getting it from us - this makes him extra proud, especially since he has quite a bit of money left in his account (he is my little miser). 

The allowances get automatically credited to their accounts every week so there is no more forgetting and the kids can't lose their money since they only own it virtually.  For easy of use we are equating Dollars and Euros which is a great deal for our kids but if I start to convert those currencies back and fro, I'll never see the end of it. 

For us, this is a great solution.  It's true that the service costs a fee  (starting at $2.50 a month for the prepaid service) and you could probably set up an Excel file to emulate the program but I'm willing to shell out that money for all the visuals and ease-of-use. We already see great results and I'm hoping that once they go off to college, they know exactly how to budget their money and how to make the most of it.

The verdict:  Recommended



We take books - Kid Edition

We are horrible book people.  We read a lot, we consume books, we love them to pieces (which drives some people we know bonkers).  We are moving to Kosovo where we can't get our book fix and where, alas, it seems shipping from amazon.de/com or from friends and relatives is just not an option. (One word: customs!)

So we are buying books in advance. 

We buy a lot of books but usually, we do it in small doses.  If you buy books for a year, though, you may be shocked to discover just how much you actually spend on books. I won't even write the number down here.  Let's just say it's A LOT.  There is, of course, also the a feeling of Torschlusspanik*. 

I posted this picture of the first few boxes on my Facebook page: 

 

 ... they buy books!

 ... they buy books!

My friend Deborah asked to see a closeup of the image so that she could sneak a look.  She has two little boys and is always looking for book inspiration. 

I think a list may be better, so here it is:  First come the German books, then the English books. Most of them are series because my kids like series.  I have some books in there where I bought the entire series, and some where I only bought one or two to see how the kids like them. 

(I also started putting links in but frankly, that's extremely labor intensive and I lack the time at the moment.  So, after a few books, you'll just have to google them. Sorry!) 

D, many of these are actually Swedish.  We do like Scandinavian literature!  

I also bought many of these at the local bookstore (well, the German ones, anyway), so some are not available to Amazon.de anymore.  I am not including any reviews, partly because we haven't read them yet!  But I can tell you that Jacob (7) enjoys both Kokosnuss and LasseMaja a lot.  Leah (4) loves Kokosnuss, Theo Tonnentier, Tilda Apfelkern and I think the rest of the books in her age slot are new to her.  Both Alan and David basically read whatever I toss at them.  The age range is from 4 to, well, to young adult, really. 

So, here we go:

  • Der kleine Drache Kokosnuss Serie (Amazon.de)
  • Detektivbüro LasseMaja Serie (Amazon.de
  • Die drei Fragezeichen Kids Serie (Amazon.de
  • Drei fürs Museum Serie (Amazon.de)
  • Linus Lindbergh Serie (Amazon.de)
  • Unter der Piratenflagge Serie (Amazon.de)
  • Monsteragentin Nelly Rapp Serie (Amazon.de)
  • Edvard.  Mein Leben, meine Geheimnisse (Amazon.de)
  • Die Kinder aus der Krachmacherstraße (Amazon.de)
  • Anton und Antonia machen immer Chaos Serie (Amazon.de)
  • Schurken überall - Serie (Amazon.de)
  • Denni, Klara, und das Haus Nr. 5 (Amazon.de)
  • Ich, Jonas, genannt Pille, und die Sache mit der Liebe (Amazon.de)
  • Gulliver Serie (Tonke Dragt) (Amazon.de)
  • Oskar gibt Gas! (Amazon.de)
  • Kreuzberg 007 Serie (Amazon.de)
  • Die Schule der Magischen Tiere Serie (Amazon.de)
  • Ein einzigartiger Freund und das ganz, ganz große Glück (Amazon.de)
  • Tilda Apfelkern Serie (Amazon.de)
  • Tonne Tonnentier und die beste Geburtstagstorte der Welt (Amazon.de)
  • Elliot und Isabelle Serie
  • Das große Buch vom kleinen Erdmännchen Gustav
  • Kotzmotz der Zauberer
  • Josef Guggenmos: Groß ist die Welt
  • Redwall (Amazon.de/Amazon.com
  • Wayside School (Amazon.de/Amazon.com)
  • The Indian in the Cupboard Series (Amazon.com
  • The Borrowers Series (Amazon.com)
  • The Giver (Amazon.com)
  • Amelia Bedelia (Amazon.de/Amazon.com)
  • Nancy Drew
  • The Time Warp Trio
  • Wild Magic
  • Dealing with Dragons
  • The Sweetest Fig
  • Encyclopedia Brown
  • Among the Hidden
  • Big Questions from Little People
  • The Archer Legacy
  • The Story of Ferdinand
  • Bridge to Terabithia
  • Tuck Everlasting
  • 20 Ways to draw a Cat and 20 Ways to draw a Tree

We are going to add more to this pile, for sure.  But that's what we have so far.  We're always happy for more suggestions!

* That horrible feeling of fear when the doors are closing on you and you know you have but little time left.  It's a very useful word.

Moving on...

We are moving on to a new adventure - and I thought it fitting to move my blog, as well.  I want to put more emphasis on the images and have a section for my daily photos that is integrated into the blog (see the nifty link on the left!).  I also got a bit tired of the old look and wanted something fresh for the new country.  I hope you will enjoy this old new blog!